Mistakes

Mistakes...we all make them, do we not? Some of us atone, Some of us don't. The severity of the mistake matters to some...Or perhaps the number of mistakes one has made. We must ask ourselves: "Does it matter how others see us; based on mistakes or not? Does it not matter how we see ourselves??". The cold hard truth is that...You can see yourself in any light you wish to. You can see yourself as on the highest pedestal..Or in he lowest gutter. Your own opinions my be false, even. What of..."others"? What of them? The sad part is...It would appear as if their opinions matter more than your own. People's opinions of you can very much be dependent upon your own inner view..Often times, though..It might not be. What about the heretics who see themselves as riotous? The pious who see themselves as unworthy? Do their opinions not matter because WE see them differently? Of course not...But we'll judge, won't we? When you look at a person..and you ask yourself "should i accept him?" or "Should i accept him NOW?" You may *think* you are looking at them for who they ARE..but you aren't...You are looking at them for who they WERE..their...Mistakes.

Separation

I walk hand in hand with him. Through the greenest of fields and the most desolate plains..I am with him. Always. We've been through the most beautiful times a person can witness...and through some of the worst only the darkest recesses of the mind can imagine. Love has been our sword and shield. We always walk together, him and I. Huh...Starting to think that may have not been the greatest of ideas. I just remembered....Jon's party. Oh, how we laughed, danced, drank..all that. The fun others had.. the emotions running through their minds..paled in comparison to those emanating from my mate and I. It was almost palpable. The smiles on our faces were genuine- a sight not seen much these days- because of each other. The love was so enormous, it felt as if we could burst..from only half of the love we felt! We stood there, staring at each other...oh, sure..and odd sight to some. Did we care? Nope!. All that existed in the world to us..was each other. Jon came to us...He was just...wow, he was out of it *chuckles*. Someone must have spiked the punch...to be funny..huh..a joke, was it? Well, either way, the party was over and my mate and I left; walking, as we would do. We held hands, kissed, hugged..everything...as we walked to our house. We moved in together, you see. After high school my mate and I were still in love..after the full 4 years even! We decided on graduation to live together..little did he know..my plans were bigger than that. Anyway...we were walking...then..it happened. Oh how i wish it hadn't..more than you know. We heard a loud noise..like a fast approaching car. We looked back..and one was speeding towards us. My mate, thinking selflessly as he would often do; pushed me out of the way. I was on the right side of us, you see; closer to the road. I just wish my mate was a little more selfish sometimes... The car swerved..and..hit..my mate. It quickly sped off, of course. I watched the car speed off...It was Jon's car. I quickly ran into the street; tears streaming down my face as i looked at my mate..Even now..beautiful. I did the typical "no, not now! it's too early" thing as he lay dying in my arms. I could just see his light fading..I heard him utter something..i knew what it was right away. I saw how close he was to that eternal rest..I reached into my pocket. I pulled out a simple, silver band...He liked things simple. I slid it onto his finger as i saw his light fully fade away. I cried heavily and asked: "will you marry me?" With his very last breath..he said: "i love you". I stood up..and walked into the darkness....

Death (a ministory)

A man stands at a door. He looks up and down it, the door standing a few stories tall, or at least appearing like it does. The man..middle aged, one would say...seeming as if but a child in front of the massive door in front of him. Standing here, in front of this door, the man thinks to himself: "where am i?". Odd that he is here, yet knows not where he is. Standing here, the man feel something very odd. He feels the urge...to recollect feelings of his life..and so he does so. He thinks as far back as he can manage..he sees...a child; just barely able to walk, it seems. He realises that that boy is him..he remembers that exact moment in time..just barely, though. He thinks farther forward in his life...he sees a teenager. Once again, the man realises that the teenager is him, as a much younger boy. He watches as this teenager goes to school, learns, loves, everything. He sees this person go to weddings, dances...he sees the joy on the person's face..or at least..the perceived joy. Was it all real happiness, a face he put on..or an act he did for himself as to not feel so hopeless? No one will know..not even the man. He watches this person's...his..life go by. He sees how much he has been hurt in life..the pain he has suffered, the loves he has lost...everything. He re-lives it all. He sees the person..him..grow up; becoming an older male. This is where his memory begins to fade..be he knows not why. The man in this vision looks in perfect health, in great shape..he doesn't understand it. The man begins to think that these visions ARE in fact..HIS own memories that HE is recalling at that very moment. This fact further Confuses the man, as he thinks: "if these are MY memories..why does this one seem to make everything fade?". Then, they become bright again..only for a moment. The man sees this vision through..another perspective. He sees himself...grab a gun from a shelf. He stares, dazed and confused at the memory, not knowing what is going on..but getting a slight idea as to what is going to happen next. The man's fears were realised when the one in the memory suddenly fires off a shot into his head; making him fall over; dead. Then, the vision stops, and the man is left staring at the huge door again; now looking smaller, and easier to open. The man finally realises where he is..and why. The person in the vision WAS him...it was HE who grabbed that gun..and ended his own life. The man looks in front of him, seeing that the door is now normal size...it clicks. THIS is the literal manifestation of death's door . The man, seeing this..loses all hope..if he hadn't already..and grasped the knob of the door in his hand. He twists it, and slowly opens it.......